I'm in my silent and lonely mode,making no phone call,sending no sms,eating lounch with nobody,starting no chat,and even not answering to the recieved calls...
and this mode make people misundrestanding about me...couse they don't know this is a loop with positive feedback...that when I feel lonely and sad ,instead of doing something to geting out of it, I make myself more lonely and sad!
like now...it's a long time-about fifty and some days- that I've not been home and even started to seeing my family members in my dreams becouse I missed them...exactly in this time I don't answer their phone calls becouse I can't speak...
or...it's last days of university and it makes me feel sad becouse it means I will be far away from my friends for an unknown long time...I will miss my friends so much but now...instead of spending more time with them and planing for any clambake, I try to stay away from them Unconsciously...I need them, but acting like a psycho,I'm spending the few remaining days with out them
I know I'm a bad doughter,a bad sister and a bad friend...I'm so sorry